i want to be more feminine...
i want to be more feminine...but struggle to do so...
Has this ever happened to you?
You want to be more feminine.
You get started on your feminine journey but you start to struggle so you change the outside... but it feels uncomfortable and unnatural.
So we retreat and step into what's more comfortable for us - we step back into our masculine nature for protection.
And we start to believe those silly lies - I'm just not a feminine woman, it's impossible for me to be black...
We doomscroll reddit, listening to a lot of different opinions about how femininity is some spirtual nirvana that is almost impossible to reach.
Or even worse, we step back because stepping into our femininity triggers some past experiences that we haven't addressed.
We've been there. When you want to be more feminine but struggle to do so...
And our hope is to help you get through.
First off, let's say this. Your femininity is not a weakness. And being a woman is not a curse, but a blessing that God has selected you to have.
And at Tiana Bay, we believe celebrating your God-given femininity starts with returning back to God. We believe that God created you for a purpose. That He loves you and is drawing you to Him. And if you want to rest in your God-given femininity, it first starts with a relationship with Jesus.
If you’re ready to reconnect with your softer side, here’s are 4 ways you can start:
1. Redefine Femininity as God defined it
First, let's let go of the idea that femininity as frail, weak or superficial. Femininity, or traits related to being a biological woman, was created on purpose for a purpose by God. You weren't created by accident but for a purpose. So, the perfect place to start is how does God view femininity what does He say about it and renew your mind with this truth. And understand this is a daily exercise. Because society likes to remind us that being a feminine women is silly or out of touch.
2. Start Small
Do not despise the day of small beginnings. You do not need to turn your bedroom into a pink, pilate loving, sephora-haul self-care asmr girlie. Start small and with immediate changes.
This is why we recommend changing how you look while you work on your spiritual, mental and physical. Be intentional with your decisions. But this will feel unnatural, because it's different than what you're used too.
Our recommendation is to add enough feminine touches to create your feminine image. Start with light light make up - like eyebrows and a neutral pink lip gloss. Start with a midi dress that's classy and comfortable. Opt for flats, kitten heels as oppose to sneakers. And stand in the mirror for 10 seconds. Take in the woman you are becoming (not in vain but study the woman you are becoming and using the power of visualization to our benefit)
3. Practice Self-Care as Self-Love
Self-care isn’t just about looking good—it’s about feeling good. Keep this mindset as front and center.
So, start with developing a healthy spiritual life by praying and worshipping - make spending time in the word of God a priority.
Next focus on sleeping well, diet and exercise and staying hydrated. Maintain a healthy bodyweight.
Now, enjoy your time with yourself. Spend less time on social, more time reading, connecting with others, enjoy quiet baths or showers, and wear clothes that feel soft and luxurious.
4. Surround Yourself with Support
Get into community with other women. Fellowship with women at your church and be intentional with what you spend your time listening. Building confidence in your femininity is easier when you’re part of a community that believes what you believe. And at Tiana Bay, we’re here to celebrate with you every step of the way
Remember, femininity is a journey - some days will be better than others but you have to be patient. There is a lot of unlearning you need to do so give yourself some grace.
And as Christians, we should remember that
Femininity does not heal you - Jesus does Femininity does not save you - Jesus does
Remember, femininity is a journey - some days will be better than others but you have to be patient. There is a lot of unlearning you need to do so give yourself some grace.
And as Christians, we should remember that
Femininity does not heal you - Jesus does
Femininity does not save you - Jesus does
It's all Jesus alone because at the end of the day, He's the only one who can make us new. We can't wash away our sins or redeem ourselves. For God so loved the world - us included - that He gave His one and only son, Jesus
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At Tiana Bay, we believe that dressing feminine is more than clothes. It's about embracing our God-given femininity, how we feel about ourselves and how we show up in the world. Growing up, my sister and I struggled to find soft feminine clothing that reflected the women we wanted to become. So, we started a feminine clothing brand to help you feel soft, delicate and beautiful while challenging the negative cultural stereotypes. We want to help you celebrate the strength and beauty that lies within a woman who knows she was born for such a time as this.