The transformative power of embracing your femininity

The transformative power of embracing your femininity

Time to read 9 min

Embracing your femininity can change your life in big ways. 

It brings balance, harmony, and deep fulfillment. By caring for your feminine side, you can become more creative, develop a better emotional intelligence, and accept who you are in Christ.

Our hope is that this blog post will help you find your femininity, and help you celebrate being a woman in a society that is requiring you to be more and more like a man.

Key Takeaways

  • Embracing your femininity can lead to greater balance and joy in your life
  • Nurturing your Godly self is a transformative process that promotes personal growth
  • Celebrating your femininity helps you cultivate a deeper connection to yourself and others

Redefining Femininity: Beyond Stereotypes

Femininity is often seen in a passive or submissive state, and so the common approach is to make femininity more “new-agey”. No surprise we see terms like “awakening your feminine energy” and tapping into your “divine feminine Goddess”. 

But all this is just a smoke screen. 

Femininity is defined as qualities or attributes regarded as characteristic of women or girls. And when it comes to Godly femininity, this is just embracing the woman God has called you to be. 

In Psalms 139:14, the psalmist shares that, for You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made

We’re not accidentally born as women, but purposely chosen and created by our Father. And to truly embrace our femininity, we have to return back to our Creator. 

Bringing our past failures and disappointments back to Him, and praying forgiveness and guidance. And through our walk with Jesus, can we truly understand who we are called to be.

We share this because femininity should not be an idol or religion, it’s just another beautiful tool of expression created by our Creator

In other words, being feminine is just part of what it means to be a woman.

Reclaiming Femininity: Being a Feminine Black Women in a Masculine-Praising Society

As black women, growing up in the 90s, the message was subtle but clear in mainstream media. We were the “superwoman” generation. We were told over and over that we were as good as boys. We can do anything a boy can do, in fact, we were told that we can do anything a boy can do, better

Songs and movies boast of women's independence, resilience and pride in not having to have to depend on men. 

But the secret subtext was that we needed to prove repeatedly that we were as good as boys / men.

The beauty in our differences was now seen as competition rather than complimentary and purposeful. And as we grew up, we started to see the stress and comfort in assuming a role that is contrary to what we were designed to be. 

As we grew up, we became providers and “in control” of our lives. And while that came with stress, there was a badge of honor that we had because we were in control. We were accomplishing what we were taught to do from a young age. 

All the while, we were secretly being taught that if we did not take control of our lives - if we did not provide for ourselves - we were worthless, weak and dependent on men. 

After all, if we weren’t as good as boys, we just weren’t good enough.

And thereby creating a more masculine group of women. 

Reclaiming femininity doesn't mean ignoring the masculine expression that you possess. 

Rather, it means to recognize when we’re functioning in a capacity that is contrary to our natural expression, why we are in that state, and step back into our feminine state. 

Biological men are naturally masculine, and therefore, tend to be providers and protectors. Whereas, biological women are naturally feminine by design, and tend to be nurturers and caregivers. 

And thereby men and women are purposefully complimentary. However, when we build a society that believes that men and women are interchangeable, we lose the beauty of the complementary nature of this and we force each person to function in a capacity that is contrary to their natural expression.

All that being said, there are seasons in life when women will step into the providers/protector role, and men can step into the nurturer and caregiver role. But when they do so, it's likely because there is no alternative. They're in survival mode. 

We see this case in relationships when one spouse loses a job/gets sick/removed from the house for any reason, the other spouse will step into the dominant role, ie the masculine role.

So, when a women is operating more masculine role - she is protecting herself and likely in a survival mode. And she can function at that state for awhile.

But if she continues to function, she may find herself burdened, angry and resentful. 

Exhausted. Mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Desiring to rest and relinquish her control to someone who is worthy to handle that control but in that role, she attracts people around her who gravitate towards that kind of environment. Other women who are in survival mode, frustrated and defeated by life but incapable of seeing a way out.

And feminine men who have grown complacent with survival mode. 

So what to do?

Well, in order for us to embrace our femininity and the transformative power of it, we first need to accept ourselves fully as woman.

The Power of Self-Acceptance

Embracing your femininity starts by first accepting yourself, flaws and all.

This is harder said than done, because we’ve all had moments in our lives when we were told that we weren’t good enough. We may have experienced neglect or abuse that damaged our psyche, pushed us in positions to constantly protect ourselves and therefore pushed us to be more masculine. 

And a huge part of being feminine is the ability to be soft and vulnerable.

Self-acceptance isn’t just accepting oneself but also dealing with our brokenness, traumas, hurts, and missed expectations. 

And rather than read affirmations, there’s a spiritual truth we need to grasp.

That there is something inherently wrong with us. We were created for a loving relationship with God, and our sin nature has kept us from so.

And that sin nature is that persistently stubborn stain we’ve been desperately trying to blot out. 

Rather than fix it ourselves, we need to look to God.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life” John 3:16
“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.” 1 John 3:16

Friends, it is this love that we use as the basis for our self-acceptance. The love demonstrated by Christ when He died for our sins. Our brokenness, hurt and trauma. 

And once we accept His love, we move differently.  

This self-acceptance helps you drop societal pressures and embrace your femininity. It helps you overcome limiting beliefs and insecurities.

"Only when you fully grasp that you were made on purpose for a purpose by a loving God, can you fully embrace your feminine identity."

And as you accept this truth, your relationships, career, and well-being will improve. 

The true power of self-acceptance is about loving what Jesus has done for you and choosing to praise Him because of His love and sacrifice and embracing the spiritual healing that comes from Him. 

One of the biggest critiques we hear from women in our community is that when it comes to being feminine, we just do not feeling safe to do so. We do not feel safe trusting men solely to protect and provide for us. 

And this is completely understandably. In Genesis, when God created man and women, masculine and feminine beings, that was before sin entered. When everything was perfect. 

It's no longer the case. So as Christian women, embracing our femininity, we need to first turn to Christ. We need to give him our hurts and pains and worries and cares, knowing that He loves us and cares for us

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 1 Peters 5:7

And the beauty about this is that rather than transferring this expectation to a man, we place it in God’s hands. And when we do this, we create a different atmosphere. We’re not bogged down with the cares, worries and frustrations of this world.

We’re reminded that we are loved and in His hands. We’re reminded that we are cared for and protected, and whatever happens, God is still in control.

We’re able to be soft because we transferred the burden of being the protector and provider back to God. 

And as we walk with God, we learn to trust Him more and more because He is faithful and just.

We don’t have to be the ones to do everything, we learn to rest.

Femininity and Vulnerability

Society often portrays vulnerability as a weakness, something to be avoided. However, it is through vulnerability that we truly connect with others and experience deep, meaningful connections.

Femininity encourages us to embrace vulnerability and allows us to tap into our emotional depths. It is through vulnerability that we discover ourselves and find the courage to express our true emotions and desires. As well as foster an environment in which others can do the same.

And this is scary, and so often we find ourselves stepping into our masculinity to protect ourselves from being vulnerable and soft. 

We’d rather take control, portray strength and toughness because we’re afraid to feel pain or experience it again. But we need to remember that vulnerability is not a weakness. It’s a requirement of life.

And by allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, we open up the doors to growth and personal development. 

We learn to trust ourselves and others, and find strength in our ability to navigate through life's challenges with grace and resilience.

And we learn to cultivate empathy, forge deeper connections, and live a more fulfilling life.

So dare to embrace your femininity and vulnerability, and experience the transformative power it brings.

Cultivating Empathy and Compassion

Once you are able to be vulnerable, you will be able to feel deeply with others. You’ll develop empathy and compassion. These traits will help you connect better with people and will also change how you see relationships.

It makes you more caring and attentive. 

By listening well, supporting emotionally, and making people feel they belong, you make your relationships stronger and more joyful.

Trait

Benefit

Empathy

Deepen understanding and connection with others

Compassion

Inspire kindness and support for loved ones

Nurturing Communication

Build stronger, more meaningful relationships


Application: How to Create the Feminine Lifestyle

We’ve already talked about how important it is for a woman to be feminine, so let’s talk about how one is to do so. 

Here are some daily activities that will help you become more feminine.

  • Start your day spending time in God’s word, meditating on the bible and basking in His love and presence. Put on your armor of love, reminding yourself that you were created on purpose for a purpose
  • Practice a form of self-care (enjoying a healthy breakfast, going for a walk, exercising in the morning)
  • Spend time pampering yourself / dress up 
  • During your workday, take time to 
    • Journaling to explore your emotions and process them - not to judge how you’re feeling but to become aware of what your emotions are saying
    • Meditation to calm the mind and remember what the scriptures you head in the afternoon
  • Spend time with your loved ones 
  • Sensual self-care, such as indulging in a luxurious bath to exercising your body, eating a healthy diet
  • Prioritizes peace, patience and positivity by setting firm  boundaries and enforcing them
  • Guard your heart by protecting what type of content you consume.
  • Seeks Godly guidance and wisdom 
  • Enjoy the little moments of life
  • Creativity through art, music, or dance to unleash your feminine creativity

These self-care practices will help you find balance as you tap into your femininity.

At Tiana Bay, we believe that dressing femininely is a powerful way to experience the transformative power of your femininity. Our hand-selected collection of high-quality, classy, and playful styles is designed to help black women reconnect with their soft, delicate, and pretty sides. Embracing your femininity can lead to greater balance and joy, nurture your Godly self, and cultivate deeper connections with yourself and others. Discover the power of feminine energy and reclaim your strength through softness with Tiana Bay. Join our newsletter today to receive exclusive updates, style tips, and special offers tailored just for you!